confused and a little paranoid

[jfk]

When you're 22 degenerative disease doesn't seem that immediate (I know it is for some but in general). Even if it did, that isn't always enough to adhere to strict code of living. I did work experience in HIV research and there were many case studies where one man without the infection would knowingly continue to expose himself to his partner who was HIV positive and inevitably after some time contract it. Some apparently cosidered it a relief.

At the time I thought that was crazy but now I see that knowing that something is bad for you (life threatening even) isn't always enough to separate yourself from it. Eating potentially poisonous food should be an excellent motivator to change your diet but I start becoming stressed about making mistakes and doubt creeps in.

I don't have acne so from an external perspective I don't always feel motivated to stick to the diet.

But my biggest issue is why are some people affected and others aren't? My sister and my two brothers look and act as if they are superhumanly healthy. They are very athletic, have clear skin, are always full of energy and they eat whatever the hell they want/stay up late etc- my mother too all her life has been really healthy, positive, full of energy and attractive.

I am the odd one out - I don't have a problem with my appearance but I get really depressed and low energy, insomnia and I try much harder than they do to stay healthy The biggest difference between us is that I worry much more and am generally harder on myself in most respects. I'm starting to wonder, is it all just a state of mind?

How come some people get acne and others don't - you can prevent it appearing through the diet but some people don't have to.

I feel much better when I am on the diet - so I would like to stay with it, but it gets me down because there are others who do whatever they want in complete ignorance and look and feel good regardless. It is easy to think what you do is never going to be enough.

[RRM]

I did work experience in HIV research and there were many case studies where one man without the infection would knowingly continue to expose himself to his partner who was HIV positive and inevitably after some time contract it. Some apparently cosidered it a relief.

In not the same way, there are people who love to drive dangerously, knowing that it may get them in a fatal accident. thrillseeking in general seems irrational and unlogic.
Or what about smoking?
Why would someone start smoking, knowing its dangerous and not even pleasant when you first try it?
We people are a weird specie.

I don't have acne so from an external perspective I don't always feel motivated to stick to the diet.

Yes, that makes perfect sense. Its easier to keep motivated if you are susceptible to acne.

But my biggest issue is why are some people affected and others aren't?

Its the same as with talent.
Why do some people have more talent to play the piano than their brother and sisters?
Its the same with your body. Every human is truly unique physically; the 'talent' / potential / weakness of every tissue in your body is different from that of somebody else. So that 2 people can both smoke 2 packs of cigarettes a day for 50 years, and one gets lung cancer while the other appears to have clear lungs.
In acne, your susceptibility depends on multiple factors, and on of them is how much sebum is produced by the skin. This also is different in every single human being, as goes for the other factors.
The same is true for mood, confidence etc., as they co-depend on the susceptibility of specific receptors in the brain to the stimulating influence of neurotransmitters.
Thats why the different impact of food, and other factors.

I'm starting to wonder, is it all just a state of mind?

Absolutely not.
Its ALSO a state of mind. But... there are many other 'physical' factors that do influence how you feel and look.

it gets me down because there are others who do whatever they want in complete ignorance and look and feel good regardless.

In that sense, acne, or being depressed is a blessing, if it got you to doing this diet.
When diet seems to make no difference, this is decreasingly true the older we get, because of the accumulating effect, plus the decrease in recovery capacity.
An affliction or disorder is a blessing if it stimulates you to learn and improve yourself. Perfection is nothing less than absolute dullness, boredom and emptyness. Life is not about being perfect, but about the journey of learning.

[Oscar]

In a weird sense you might consider yourself lucky that you do have a reason to eat more healthy. Ingesting toxins on a daily basis can have its noticable effects sooner or later, but it will come at some point. My dad always told me "Wait until you're 40...", and he's right. Around the age of 40 (and usually already before) signs of degeneration start to show, and from there it's only a downhill path. Research done in The Netherlands shows that by the age of 41-47 (41 for women, 47 for men) the average person will have a chronic illness. Around 61 years is the expected age of living "in good health", as experienced by the test subjects. So from that age until death (77 for men, 81 for women) is a period of discomfort and disease.

One way to look at it is an investment for the future. Well worth it, if you ask me...

And yes, the mind does have an influence on the body. I believe we can think ourselves ill, and for sure a simple thing like sleep (deprivation) can have a huge effect on our health. Like RRM said, this doesn't mean it's all mental, but it can play a part.

[avalon]

RRM wrote:

Its the same as with talent.
Why do some people have more talent to play the piano than their brother and sisters?

You had me all the way until 'Talent'. I believe that Talent has to do with Interest which could be related to FREE ASSOCIATION and RANDOM INFLUENCE which guide each individual along their unique path. Coupled with Parental dos and don'ts, it's a real toss-up where we eventually land. And, if we're lucky enough to find enough inner strength to break free of nay-sayers- for example- who do you think you are to do this? Or, You're not this.' Then we learn that the bottom line is- How badly do you want to do something.

I've had more than 30 people/friends tell me that they could never draw anything more than a stick-figure. This just isn't true. They have not had the interest to do so. If you want to learn how to paint a painting, I can teach you. But, you'll have to WANT to learn. Where does the interest come from? Anywhere/everywhere. But there is nothing, other than physical deformity, and even then ? to stop anyone at any age from learning something new.

Do I believe some are more creative than others, yes, but I believe it has to do with learning more-so than with biology.

Sorry, talent is a big issue with me. If I had listened to my Father, I never would have written a novel, or several tv show scripts. Have I sold them, not yet. Do I believe I can, you bet-cha!

I believe if you want to you can. How ever that plays out. Even at my lowest-low I believe this to be true.

Best wishes,
Avalon

[Oscar]

I completely agree with you, Avalon.

[johndela1]

I have a massive interest in music. I have played for over 20 years. I've played with all kinds of musicians. I learn slow. Some people I've met learn really fast, they have better rhythm and can hear more notes played at the same time than I can hear.

In my experience, I think some people are more talented than others. Maybe the fact that people are more interested in things is because they are naturally talented and it comes easy to them.

[Oscar]

In my experience it's not the case, but I guess there's a case to be made for each option. For instance I could argue it's a "divine excuse", meaning it's the same as saying "it was God's will", putting the responsability outside oneself. In other words "I'm not good in/did not choose this because I don't have any/enough talent".

Ultimately it boils down to the question how much our genes determine, and even then there can be the question "Did we choose this life before we were born, or not?".

[RRM]

I think some people are more talented than others.

Asolutely. If not, we all could do the same things with equally much effort, and thats simply not true.
Equally devoted, for some musicians it takes just an hour to learn a play, while others need many more hours.
No matter how much I tried and how dedicated I was, I could never run 100 meters under 12 seconds, while I was a sport fanatic, and I loved it, whereas many others can do it naturally.

By definition we are different, not just physically in appearance, but also in physiology; how many cells in what tissue, how sensitive receptors in the brain and so on.
Talent is difference.
Thats what we are; differently talented.
By being being unique, our talents are as well.

[avalon]

RRM wrote:

No matter how much I tried and how dedicated I was, I could never run 100 meters under 12 seconds, while I was a sport fanatic, and I loved it, whereas many others can do it naturally.

I'll have to agree when you are talking about physical limitations, specifically.

At the same time, many people will never learn something because of a lack of belief in themselves among other things. And I'm not sure of the 'Naturally' theory. Something caught their interest, and they went for it. Maybe they started earlier in life. Maybe they had that .5 xtra desire that you didn't. Maybe from a magazine clipping they read a few months before you might have...

Haven't you seen Karate Kid? Come on! Wipe on! Wipe off!

[RRM]

At the same time, many people will never learn something because of a lack of belief in themselves among other things.

Sure.

But we all have physical limitations. And since we are different, so are our limitations, and thus talents.

[Oscar]

How hard does one work to overcome these so-called physical limitations? Did you train every day and work to specialize your muscles for the 100m sprint, or did you have more interests and/or other priorities?

Limitations are there because we believe what we think or want to see. Even more, we believe what we expect to see. Thus we see it as extraordinary when people do achieve something not normally associated with their kind of physique or physical circumstances. Somehow we're always eager to find excuses why something would not work for us.

I'm not saying there aren't any individual differences, but they might be far less important than we think.

As Koot en Bie (a dutch comic duo) said: "fysiek is altijd psychisch" (physical is always psychogical).

[RRM]

I'm not saying there aren't any individual differences

If there are, they determine your talents.

[Oscar]

So if talents are mental, then those differences don't mean anything.

[johndela1]

I'd say many talents are physical. I think if you look at champion sprinters before they became great you'd find they had more fast twitch fibers that say champion distance runners and vice versa. Guys who are great in the NBA are usually taller before they play ball. I've met people who don't do music at all, but when I try to teach them they seem to be able to naturally hear things better than people I know who have been playing for years. I think these people who have been good musicians but never found out becaues it never interested them. It could also be that they had an early exposure to music and didnt' tell me.

[RRM]

Physical differences such as height are not mental, of course, but they do co-determine your 'talent' for certain sports.